If Everyone Went to Harvard...

Recent dating woe #1

Meet Lindsey*. In case you're wondering, he is not a she. I met Lindsey on the subway, one of those nasty swampy New York City days. We met up after his screenwriting class, I thought wow he's so versatile! He had suggested meeting in Union Square...in front of the Barnes & Nobles.

So there we were, in front of Barnes &Noble. "Where should we go?" said Lindsey. Um...I'm sorry did I miss the memo that said let's roam random areas of Manhattan. It's one thing, if you have been dating someone and you're walking around the city, but this is a first date for Pete's sake!

Anyway, we went to "The Coffee Shop." For those who are not from New York City, fyi: it is not in fact a coffee shop but a restaurant and/or boozy drunk stop at the end of an evening. We sit down at a table in the quiet area of the bar/restaurant and he orders tea. I'm not talking a long island iced tea, I mean a peppermint tea. As any proper lady (don't worry kids, I'm not following through with my mother's dreams of cotillion) I followed his lead and ordered a coffee.

Officially my first non-alcoholic date I have ever been on. There is nothing wrong with being sober sally, but as someone who thrives on drinking boys under a table, seeing me not drink is like watching a dog walk on its hind legs. Nevertheless, the conversation was pretty decent for a first date. (As we know, first dates are rarely "great.")

After about an hour and a half of him quizzing me on my life, I needed to know more about the doofy looking yet cute guy sitting across from me! He proceeds to tell me that he lived in some middle of nowhere town that might as well have had people walking around barefoot in overalls and couldn't wait to get as far away from there as possible. He continues...he went to Princeton undergrad and then went to Harvard.

How can you not respond with WOW!
ME: "What did you get a masters in?"
LINDSEY: "I was at Harvard getting my PH.D."

I officially felt like an idiot after telling him numerous drunken stories of staying out until 5 a.m. (including this past Saturday night) and wrestling another friend for her beer bong that she keeps in her apartment.

ME: "You're so humble about your education. You should wear it as a badge of honor!"
LINDSEY: "Most people become uncomfortable when speaking with such a smart individual."

Now, for anyone who knows me, it takes a lot to make me uncomfortable, which I of course informed him that, nope! still ok.

LINDSEY: "I sometimes make people uncomfortable with my smarts, and didn't have the "normal" college experience." (yea I got that part.) "With one beer, I'm tipsy and with two I'll black out."

Sadly enough, THAT was the comment that made me uncomfortable, a boy who can't drink.

After a trip to the restroom, Lindsey returns to the table, sits down and...

LINDSEY: "I think you're SO energetic. I am amazed by your energy in the best possible way and I have enjoyed hanging out! But I'm afraid that I will slow you down."
ME: "Uh...excuse me?"
LINDSEY: "I love your energy but I don't stay out till 5am drinking with my buddies and I don't want to hold you back by any means."
ME: "Uh...well, I have enjoyed your company the past few hours and..."
LINDSEY: "Okay great! We'll get together when I get back from my trip to San Diego!"

We walked to 23rd street where our paths went in opposite directions.

LINDSEY: "Do you want anything from San Diego?"
ME: "That's really sweet, but have a good time. Why are you going, by the way?"
LINDSEY: "I'm going with some friends to ComicCon." (For those of you who are googling what that is, it's a place for all dweebs and comic geeks alike to get together and have an excuse to dress as their favorite superhero (or villain) at the age of...38!

As my jaw drops to the sidewalk, I quickly give him a hug and tell him to have a safe trip.

I had agreed on a second date with him upon his return...he is really nice and yea, he's smart. Besides, I'm always looking for the nice guy instead of the asshole. Funny enough, I received a text from him this morning: "Hello from San Diego! And hello from me too!"

In thinking that "beggars can't be choosers," I'm sure he'll get a second date and a response to his text.

*Just to throw it out there, I will not be using anyone's real names because hey, some of the guys, despite what the critics (my friends) may think, sometimes you need to give them a second chance to realize how utterly awful they really are.